6/19/2005

Trip of Enlightenment

Yesterday's trip went okay.

We left at 8:30am. Sydney decided she needed to go so we took her as well. We went to McDonalds to get breakfast then on the outskirts of town I stopped to gas up. As we pulled out of the gas station, Ashton told me that Alec had taken his seat belt off. So I stopped in the parking lot and got out opened his door, forgetting to shut mine, and started to put his seatbelt on. Sydney jumped out my open door and headed for the highway. I turned quickly to chase her and I fell semi twisting my ankle. I got up and coaxed her back into the car. She still hasn't got the "come" command down yet. I shut my door, secure Alec's seatbelt, shut his door then got in the car and we were on our way.

My route was Farmington, Shiprock, Gallup then Grants. My parents insisted on me going this was because if I broke down, there was more traffic. This route ended up being 254 miles. We stopped in Gallup and got Burger King for lunch then we headed for Grants. Keep in mind we had to stop about every 50 miles or so for Alec to go to the bathroom. When we got closer to Grants, I figured we would see signs for the prison.....WRONG!!!! No signs anywhere. So I stopped at the Western New Mexico Visitor's Center. Very nice place and very clean bathroom. But there were alot of travelers there and I was to embarassed to ask where the prison was, so we drove on. About 10 miles outside Grants I see a hotel/casino. I go into the hotel part and I tell the lady, "I have a very embarassing question to ask you" she just smiled and asked how she could help me. I asked her where the prison was and she said which one and I said the men's prison. She gave me directions. She was so nice. Anyway, I had missed the turn off by about 8 miles--not bad for my past getting lost record. We get there and I wait at the guard's station for him to come out. He makes us all get out and he searches the car, pats me down and runs the metal detector over all of us. He is upset because we brought Sydney, but I told him that we were not planning on staying long. He lets us in. We have to walk across a large parking lot with prisoners behind fences watching us. CREEPY!!!! We get to the front office and I give the guy their dad's name and he said he can't find him on his list. So I give him is SSN and he finds him and says that they moved him 2 days ago back to Los Lunas. DEEP SIGH..... Just then about 10 inmates walk in, unguarded--eeekkkk, looking for their vitiam supplements--OMG, such punishment--my first reaction was to get the heck out of there, but I rethought and decided that I was safer in the room with the guards rather then in a parking lot with prisoners running amuck--lol.

We got in our car and headed back to the gate, the guard asked me what happened. I told them they moved him, he said wow something bad must of happened because they never move them that fast--I just shook my head and waved good-bye and we drove out. I noticed on the road there was a sign that said "DO NOT PICK UP HITCHHIKERS IN THIS AREA". I giggled a bit and kept driving.

I am not a rich or snobby person, but I have never felt like "white trash" before until our prison visit. I was embarassed and humiliated. My sons however were not phased, they were their to see their dad and that is all that mattered to them. To have the innocience of youth.

As we were driving home, via the Bisti Highway this time, the short way only 120 miles I told Ashton I was sorry, I really did try. He said "Mom, it's okay you don't have to try so hard for me" I said "Yes I do Ashton, you are my son". He just smiled at me and once again my heart melted, but in a good way.

So even though our mission failed, my purposed succeeded. I showed my son that my love for him was greater than anything else. I showed him that I would do anything for him reguardless of how I felt about it personally. Most importantly, I showed myself that my love for my children is greater than any other emotion of fear on this earth.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY EVERYONE -- EVEN THE MOMS OUT THERE.